Who’s learned something from the sales guru Dale Carnegie?!
Read the 8 Things Dale Carnegie Got Right About Social Engagement: http://bit.ly/OcDXyC
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When Dale Carnegie began teaching 100 years ago, nobody, not even he could imagine what has become of his legacy. Carnegie taught hundreds of lectures to thousands of students who sought the wisdom he had learned to harness.
He developed a set of thirty principles in a codex called “How to Win Friends and Influence People” 75 years ago that iterated his philosophy on how to win friends and influence people. Ask anyone, even current CEO of the Carnegie Empire, Peter Handal and he’ll tell you that the elder Carnegie’s secret to success was influencing people. “You can change people’s behavior by changing your attitude towards them,” said Handal of Carnegie’s philosophy.
100 years later, Dale Carnegie Training works to provide leaders and employees in corporations and government agencies with the skills necessary to influence people the exact same way Dale Carnegie himself prescribed those skills. Dale Carnegie Training allows teams and individuals the opportunity to attend leadership training seminars as well.
The first principle that Dale Carnegie offered to his audience was “Don’t criticize, condemn, or complain.” This ideal teaches us to be kind and thoughtful when considering other peoples’ feelings. Its about showing respect to get respect — treating others the way you want to be treated. This principle encourages an open mind when talking other people.
Don’t criticize a person for having a different opinion than you because everyone’s opinion matters regardless of whether there is 100 percent agreement. If you skip right to criticizing, you will never get anything accomplished. The most common natural reaction for someone is to clam up and shy away from a conversation with you. This is especially important in the workplace when trying to settle a conflict. Conflict resolution does not happen by criticizing your fellow team members.
Don’t condemn your coworker or friend for doing something you don’t believe was right. There may be a reason why he or she decided to do things that way. And you won’t know that unless you approach your friend with an open mind and a cool head. Condemning another person’s actions without knowing the full circumstance of that action is immature and short-sighted.
Don’t complain about a decision that was made or about a problem you are having. Instead work actively to solve it. Ask yourself what’s the worst that could possibly happen, and then look for a solution. Someone once told me that ‘complacency is the enemy of progress.’ Complaining about your job or something that happened is going to prevent you from solving the problem and its going to get you a lot of annoyed looks from your cohorts. People don’t want to hear you complain about something that happened in the past, they want to hear how or what you did to solve it.
Without jumping to conclusions, I task you to apply this principle to your life. Look closely at the difference between the two options afterwards and post a comment here letting us know how it turned out. If you follow this guideline, you will feel less stressed and more willing to try this again in the future because it worked for you once before. I encourage you to try this because you’ll walk away from the situation with a good feeling, a high level of productivity and a positive working relationship with your coworker.
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